You Know Your Obsessed With Transformers When:
by CaMaRoFaN14
Summary: "You Know you're Obsessed With Transformers When:"  The title was enough to make my curiosity flare up full strength. I walked right out of the room and closed the door behind me soundlessly.  "if i die after i read this... i have no regrets."
1. Chapter 1

Alright I know I should be working on other things but I can't help but write this down.

We all know Sera and Syria come from a different universe and they did write some fan fictions back in their universe. We also know that their friends frequently drop by, so what if they happened to give sera and Syria the list of **"you know you're obsessed with transformers when:"** list. Well sideswipe being the snoop that he is finds the very extensive list in Sera's bedroom. What do you think will happen when the mechs read it? Read on if you dare, oh and if you want copy and paste a few on to your profile since this list does kind of apply to that.

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Disclaimer: I own nothing but Sera, Syria, and Joey all recognizable characters are the sole property of Hastak and I would bet that that's how it will always be. I will return them when they have served their purposes but their sanity may be completely dead by the time that happens.

_You know you're obsessed with the transformers if you are looking at this._

-Sera and Syria

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Sideswipe's POV

Finally she fell in to the state of sleep he needed her in; the humans called it REM sleep or rapid eye movement sleep the deepest sleep a human could achieve without going in to a comma. I materialized my holoform in to her room and watched her still form for any sign that she suspected my presence.

My brother was currently in recharge so I was alone for now; her twin sister as well was asleep so nobody knew I was in here hopefully. She had forbidden me from entering her room if she wasn't awake, or if she hadn't invited me. To quote her _"if you ever come in my room without my permission, I don't care if megatron is ripping out primes spark you are to not come in without my permission." _At first I thought that was a little harsh but then again humans liked their privacy. I walked soundlessly over to her bedside and watched her for a few moments before pulling a few wayward strands of her crimson hair from her face.

She slept peacefully tonight a small smile adorning her full lips; I had to resist the urge to place my lips on hers. She was a twitchy sleeper for sure her legs kicking out every so often and her arms coming over her eyes at random intervals.

"Sunny you idiot." She murmured in her sleep

I held back a laugh she apparently talked in her sleep or at least insulted people in her sleep. She rolled over and something fell out of the bed. I tensed and waited for her to wake up and possibly kill my holoform and me. Nothing she didn't even stir instead she let out a sleepy laugh and became still again. The mysterious object that had fallen out of the bed was a very thick binder full of papers. _'How did I not notice that?'_ I asked myself before picking up the strange binder. I closed it and got a good look at the cover.

The cover was covered in pictures from their original home, with their friends, a few of the other mechs like ironhide and ratchet, their mother, me and my twin brother, Lennox, Sam, Mikeala, and Annabelle but mostly their friends and themselves. In the center of the binder cover the title of the bunch of papers written in Sera's elegant script.

"_**You Know you're Obsessed With Transformers When:"**_

The title was enough to make my curiosity flare up full strength. I walked right out of the room and closed the door behind me soundlessly. I sat in my alternate form looking at the thick binders cover contemplating if I should even open it. I pulled away from the human barracks and made my way to the and place the binder on the human table and sat down in front of it.

"If I die after I read this I have no regrets." I muttered before opening the binder.

The first page was a memo of sorts:

* * *

_Dear readers,_

_Or should I say transfans before you read this you should probably ask yourself how much you really like these guys. For me and my friends they are the air we breathe, the water we drink, the last things we see at night and the first things we see when we wake up. For me and my sister they are so much more than that, but im getting off topic. Read on if you think you have the transfan addiction if you don't have it read it any way for a good laugh. _

_Sincerely, Sera and Syria Corona _

: End memo:

I blinked my holoform eyes, I knew sera and Syria wrote but I didn't know how much. I turned the page and immediately began to read.

* * *

_**You know you're obsessed with the transformers when: **_

_**1. You nickname yourself after your favorite mech and or femme.  
2. You think that Darth Vader is a pussy and megatron is the true lord of the sith.  
3. You squeal uncontrollably when you see any of the cars from transformers; no matter what generation.  
4. You cuss as badly as ratchet, or ironhide, the Chevy twins, or the Lamborghini twins.  
5. You have perfected your evil sunstreaker or megatron laugh.  
6. When you leave home you shout "ROLL OUT!" Or "DECEPTICONS MOBILIZE!"  
7. You hear any song on the radio and you immediately think of a transformer.  
8. Whenever you hear an explosion you immediately run outside screaming "Wheeljack!"  
9. You tell your physics teacher that he/she is full of it and that the transformers have proven it is possible to travel faster than the speed of light.  
10. You look at Barney and think about armada megatron quickly followed by the thought "megatron I have lost what little respect I had for you."  
11. While all the other children obsessed over their yu-gi-oh and Pokémon you were still obsessing over the newest transformers toy.  
12. You're a girl and when you mother gave you a Barbie you immediately set it on fire and demanded a transformer instead.  
13. You cried when starscream died in armada.  
14. You give every yellow Lamborghini a very large berth.  
15. You have an irrational fear of black and white Saleen mustangs  
16. You think that the police motto 'To Punish and Enslave.' Is more fitting than 'To Protect and Serve.'  
17. You start school wide allegiances and stage a full scale battle over control over the school lunch rotunda.  
18. You're a boy and you thought that G.I Joe could go die in a hole and that transformers was so much cooler.  
19. You would gladly kill anyone who told you that harry potter was better than transformers.  
20. Your friends often call you as vain as tracks or worse Sunstreaker  
21. Your pranking record is almost as extensive as sideswipes or skywarps.  
22. You often picture somebody you hate being run over by your favorite autobot/decepticon  
23. You can accurately quote all the movies word for word.  
24. You become angry when someone misquotes the transformers.  
25. You no longer cuss in your native language you cuss in cybertronian.  
26. When your friends have been pranked by you they scream "LAMBORGHINI TWINS!" instead of your names.  
27. You became severely depressed when jazz was ripped in half  
28. You cried when optimus died in the 1986 movie and in the 2009 movie.  
29. You get in to accidents on the off chance ratchet or first aid will pick you up.  
30. Your friends all have transformers designations and ranks  
31. Whoever has the designations optimus prime and megatron in your little group are the leaders and you follow them without question  
32. You can never look at a boom box the same way ever again  
33. You do your college thesis on why Wheeljacks inventions always explode or where optimus's trailer goes when he transforms.  
34. You shudder at the thought of optimus or for that matter any of the older mechs saying "all the shorties in the house say YEAH!"  
35. This also goes for "it's so hot today I saw a squirrel rubbing sun block on his nuts!"  
36. You pull a sunstreaker when someone messes up your hair.  
37. Therapy is useless and your transformers delusions agree with you.  
38. The mach 5 race car has nothing on Blur  
39. You think gundam is stupid and transformers always will be better.  
40. You send IDW angry letters for killing sunstreaker off repeatedly.  
41. Remote controlled robots are no longer good enough for you.  
42. You go to Hoover dam monthly to make sure megatron is safely under all those layers of ice.  
**_

* * *

  
I leaned back impressed and slightly worried, impressed because some of them were pretty accurate, and worried because Sera had done at least half the list if not more. I wanted to continue but I was already in enough trouble for taking it no need to get caught with it. I slipped the binder in to subspace and returned to my quarters for some recharge. All the while the large smirk on my face plates never left.

Soooooooo what do you guys think? Good? Bad? Or just okay? Your reviews will tell me. This came to me while reading my profile and I saw the signs of a rabid transformers fan girl on it and well this was born.  
So review and tell me what you think.

**This was written to help get the writer juices flowing again, and for my personal enjoyment. **


	2. Chapter 2

YAY another chapter! Alright I don't know how many chapters this is going to have but I can't thank you all enough for the favorites and the reviews. In fact I was going to update next Friday but since you guys have been favoriting and reviewing so much I decided that I might as well get this out before all the funny drains out of me.

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_*Syria*_ "_GIVE ME YOUR FACE!"  
*Sera*"well someone had too much sugar today didn't they?"  
*Syria twitching and foaming at the mouth* "maybe."  


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_Disclaimer: I own nothing but Sera, Syria and Joey. The mechs belong to Hastak and I will return them when im done but their sanity and interface ports may never be the same again.

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Sunstreakers POV

Sideswipe was acting strange, I mean stranger than normal something about his constant smile was off. The kind of smile he had on right now could be described as his 'I found blackmail smile.' Or his 'someone is going to be pranked smile.' What I wanted to know was why?

Syria was currently tearing apart her shared quarters with her sister searching for a mysterious object that they would only hint at. Sideswipe was more interested in cuddling with sera but of course she didn't care she was too focused on finding the object. I'd long noticed that Syria was not in the mood to be intimate so I just sat on the long couch and watched.

"Frag it sides! How could you lose it? Its freaking thicker than your thigh and bright colored!" Syria complained as she searched sera's room

"I remember falling asleep with it and waking up and poof gone not a trace."

"Sideswipe get the fuck off me! Im not in the mood." Sera ordered and sideswipe took the hint finally.

*why are you smiling like that?* I asked as he sat down next to me.

*no reason, but do me a favor take patrol for me tonight?* sideswipe was practically begging me to take his patrol. I shook my head and glared at him.

*why not?* he whined

*because, it's your night not mines so just do It.* I retorted

*fine…* sideswipe trailed off in to unintelligible grumblings so I shut him out.

Sera and Syria eventually stopped looking in Sera's room and began to search their entire quarters. Syria was becoming more agitated by the second and was now just throwing things around in a flurry of anger. Not that I blamed her, her hormones were screaming with her anger. Was she having that thing the humans called P.M.S because if she was I was out of here?

"Fuck it sides its not here." She said sagging on to the tile floor.

"Damn me, damn unicron, damn the binder, damn my life!" sera said flopping on to the floor next to her.

"What exactly is it you're looking for?" I asked maybe I'd seen it at some point but forgot.

"It's a really thick black binder with a ton of pictures on the front cover of you guys our friends, our mom, us and its got a whole bunch of important papers in it. If you see it don't open it just bring it back here." Syria explained getting up and walking out.

"C'mon sides maybe you left it at the training room."

"Yeah, maybe."

Wait she said black binder? With a lot of pictures? He'd seen that on sideswipes side of their shared quarters. So he had it, go figure that slag head had it. Well he wasn't going to have it for much longer. Normally he wouldn't snitch on his brother but he was stressing out his femme and his own femme and that was not acceptable.

I blinked my holoform out of existence and sped back to our quarters. I transformed in mid air and almost ripped the door open. I'd seen the binder under his berth wedged in to a very small space. I went to the supposed hiding place and of course I found it. I pulled it out carefully and read the cover.

"**You Know you're Obsessed With Transformers When:" **

Of course sideswipe had it, and worst of all he hid it intentionally. Sera was going to kill him for sure. However I wondered why he would even bother taking it in the first place? I turned on my holoform and opened the binder carefully.

I read the first forty two with a smile, I especially liked number 14 sideswipe had this page book marked, apparently he stopped here. Well no wonder he was hogging it! This was a good read that and it was another piece to the complicated puzzle that was Syria, so why stop? So I continued to read.

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_**43. You go to Botcon EVERY time it happens religiously.  
44. You have playlists for each of the mechs in the movies.  
45. You try- and fail- to do real Jet Judo  
46. You have perfected your own style of Jet Judo  
47. You laugh uncontrollably when you see the carameldancing girls and compare them to the command trine. (Starscream, skywarp, thundercracker.)  
48. You squeal when you see a black police cruiser thinking its barricade.  
49. Your electronics are named after fallen autobots and decepticons.  
50. You think the ghost of starscream is haunting you.  
51. You laugh whenever you think about how kid-friendly sunstreaker is in G1 and yet how he is so violent in the comics.  
52. You wish your car would transform in to one of the mechs.  
53. You pray to God for your own bumblebee (also applies to others.)  
54. Your friends refer to you as swindle constantly  
55. All if not most of your fan fictions are transformers related.  
56. You nickname your red or silver sports car sideswipe  
57. You used to hate Linkin Park and now it's your favorite band.  
58. You think the song I can transform ya by lil Wayne featuring Chris brown and Swiss beats is probably the greatest song ever! (Or any other song that refers to transformers.)  
59. You know every song on the transformers and revenge of the fallen soundtrack by heart.  
60. "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" is your new battle cry when you get in to fights with the twihards.  
61. You refrain from hitting all electrical appliances for fear they might come alive and hit you back.  
62. You pray to lord primus instead of your own God/Gods  
63. If you were to ever win the lottery you would buy the rights to own your favorite transformer  
64. Also you would buy the corvette stingray concept and laugh at those who don't have it.  
65. You snap awake immediately when someone mentions the transformers in any way shape or form  
66. You see a car crash and think "that stupid human killed that mech!"  
67. You think of Wheeljack/ ironhide when you hear this "there is little that cannot be solved by a large amount of explosives."  
68. When someone messes up your hair you scream "MY PAINT!" instead of "MY HAIR!"  
69. You run for class president under the slogan "peace through tyranny." Or "freedom is the right of all sentient beings."  
70. Whenever you hear someone say "whats crackin' little b*****es." you want to cry.  
71. You laugh when you see or if you were to ever see an ambulance being followed by two Lamborghinis  
72. The thought that follows that "poor, poor ratchet." Or "what did the twins do this time?"  
73. You call the Kennedy space center and ask if they know where planet junk or cybertron are yet.  
74. They know your call schedule and have asked you to stop calling.  
75. Your local army enlistment office has banned you from signing up for N.E.S.T since they think it doesn't exist.  
76. You think that area 51 is experimenting on the transformers.  
77. You imagine your friend's dad's truck colored blue with flames.  
78. You think your best friend is an "autobot pretender"  
79. Your friends are afraid of you and what this addiction has done to your personality.  
80. Sunstreaker reminds you of a very tall Edward Cullen just moody and violent.  
81. You think you're adopted and your parents are actually cybertronians.  
82. Your afraid to look at any cat weird for fear its ravage.  
83. You think that strange cat next door is ravage.  
84. The thought that follows it "I thought bumblebee tore out your spine!"  
85. You jump out of bed when you hear a car revs its engine outside of your window and make sure your car is still there.  
86. You refer to electricity as energon.  
87. Soda is also referred to as energon.  
88. Your parents don't take away your phone and your iPod they take away all your transformers related items.  
**_-

I shook with laughter, most of these things sera and Syria had done or it had happened to them in the first place. Now that he thought about it why give it back? No wonder sideswipe had taken it, it was really funny to read, but the little voice in the back of his processor was nagging at him that karma was going to get him back somehow.

'Well voice you can go frag yourself im keeping it!' he thought back to the voice.

*sideswipe I found the binder.* I sent

*I swear to Primus if you rat me out-*

*calm down im not going to rat you out since I read it to, sera and Syria told me not to even open it so if they find out we are both going to die.*I said cutting him off.  
*good. You better not have taken my book mark out!*

*to late.* I sent back and then cut him off completely.

I shoved the binder back in its hiding place and walked out of my quarters. Maybe Syria would want to go for a long drive now.

* * *

There part two finished. Note that some of them were made with the help of friends of mine. I thank all who reviewed and im happy you liked the first part. You can only squeeze so many out before your brain decides its enough.

Thank you to:

**manic the hedeghog****: **trust me I don't do half of them but combined me and my friends do the whole list and more.

**XxBlackEaglexX:**my mom actually gave me a few I missed so our parents both know the addiction.

**AutobotJena****: **don't worry there is an organization that deals with this addiction to transformers, Transformers Anonymous (p.s I tried it didn't help me!)

**hopes-and-dreams-last-forever****: ** trust me I read this to my friends and I told them to raise their hands if they do this or ever did this. Their hands only went down once because they were laughing hard.

**dreamer: **its sideswipe what do you think he is gonna do? Besides the twins (my twins) are kind of embarrassed by it so of course he wants to keep it.

**BBgal1****: **there your prayer has been answered! Oh and don't worry to quote RotF "revenge is coming!"

_**This fanfiction was written for the sole purpose of my entertainment and that of others, that and to get the creative juices flowing again.**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Wazzup peoples! This will probably be the last chapter for "you know you're obsessed with transformers when: "thanks for all the reviews and I hope you like this chapter. The mechs are about to be shocked!**

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"_You know, there was a time when we would take a person like you and beat you to death with a garden hose but now you've got your damn unions and they kill all the fun." _

"_Good to know that im not going to die by garden hose." _

'_My friend and I having a random moment at school the teacher gave us the 'what the hell' look.'

* * *

_

Sideswipes POV

Most of the mechs; no all of the mechs had at least read a page of the now famous black binder. To be honest it was really entertaining picturing the humans on base doing some of these things. The humans didn't even know what we were laughing about all the time.

The only ones not happy, no that's an understatement they were downright depressed and they were also very agitated. Sam had asked what was wrong with them and had received a very nasty looking black eye from Syria. Which bumblebee was not very happy about by the way. Oh well we weren't about to give up our new source of entertainment.

I began to read the final pages of the binder in my quarters locking the doors. I would forward the rest to the others simply because if I just passed it around there would be more of a chance that Sera and Syria would notice it.

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_**89. You custom ordered your contacts to resemble the mechs optics. (Red or blue.)  
90. Your parents are also obsessed with transformers but just less.  
91. When you watch TV you can't help but think about what the mechs would think about that commercial.  
92. When you see three jets you immediately take cover or begin to make insulting signs up at them.  
93. Your room is covered with transformers merchandise.  
94. You own the multiple universe guides and have them highlighted for important facts.  
95. You used to fear explosions… now they make you feel all fuzzy and giddy inside.  
96. You constantly read up on any new information for transformers three despite the fact that it's coming out in 2011.  
97. You are constantly wishing Wheeljack would blow up your school for the heck of it.  
98. You wonder what you would look like as a cybertronian.  
99. You own at least one transformers related article of clothing.  
100. You have a tattoo pertaining to the faction you choose.  
101. Your pets have transformers names of some kind.  
102. Your car has some kind of transformers related decal.  
103. When your kids ask if they can watch transformers on a school night, the answer is ALWAYS yes.  
104. Your kids don't question why they have transformers movie nights any more.  
105. You have called your local officer either barricade or prowl.  
106. Your teachers have also become aware of your obsession and have recommended you to the counselor for help.  
107. You wear your favorite transformers colors. (Ex: sideswipe red or silver depending on universe.)  
108. You are no longer embarrassed by your obsession and make it known to the world.  
109. You see the title deception and your brain immediately interprets it as Decepticon.  
110. You only went to see that movie because you thought it was decepticon.  
111. You hear the lines "the subliminal mind f*** America" from American idiot by green day and think SoundWave.  
112. You remember feeling all fuzzy inside when optimus prime smiled in the old cartoons.  
113. You know when the twins smile something is up.  
114. You plan to buy at least one of the cars that looks like the ones used in transformers (Ex: Chevrolet camaro.)  
115. You have assigned the mechs theme songs (Ex: optimus prime "you got the touch." Stan bush.)  
116. You think Stan bush is hiding the real location of the transformers.  
117. For you birthday you want to visit N.E.S.T headquarters or Diego Garcia  
118. SoundWave reminds you of pedo bear.  
119. You crack up when you hear how starscream sounds in G1 and it's your ringtone for your brother.  
120. Megatron is now known as trigger crotch among you and your friends.  
121. You already know more than most people about what is going to happen in transformers three.  
122. You have keyed the decepticon insignia in to your enemy's car door in the hopes that the autobots will do something about them.  
123. You constantly pretend to be a transformer.  
124. You join the air force just to pilot a F-16, F-15, F-22 raptor.  
125. You KNOW that Michael bay has something against sunstreaker for not putting him in transformers 3.  
126. Your license plate reads 'WE R 84'  
127. Reading a normal book no longer interests you, you prefer fan fictions about transformers.  
128. You think the maximal's and the predacons are annoying and that nobody can replace the original autobots and decepticons.  
129. Beast wars were enough to make you want to forget about the transformers. (But you watched it anyway.)  
130. For Halloween you dressed like your favorite transformer.  
131. For superhero day in school you dressed like optimus prime. (Who says he isn't a superhero.)  
132. You wait for the day the transformers will actually exist so you can rub it in every non-believers face.  
133. You have mastered the art of talking like blur.  
134. You find shockwave much scarier than some murderer.  
135. You believe that every U.F.O is cosmos messing with us all.  
136. You question the real world's physics. It should be impossible for megatron to fly since he's a gun yet he can.  
137. You have dressed up as one of the mechs for Botcon.  
138. You tried to get cybertronian as you language elective in high school.  
139. You have all the music from the original 1986 movie stored in you iPod.  
140. You name your electronics after fallen autobots and decepticons.  
141. You could actually follow the plot for RotF  
142. You were displeased no pissed off when jazz was killed off because he was **_**too**_** popular.  
143. You were tempted to name your child after a transformer. (You didn't though.)  
144. You do/or have imagined what sex would be like with a cybertronian.  
145. After wondering that you shuddered/blushed and thanked primus SoundWave didn't exist so he couldn't read your mind.  
146. You accidentally doodled the autobot insignia over your homework and had to start all over.  
147. You have tried to locate tranquility Nevada.  
148. You used to be a very non-violent person until you watched transformers.  
149. Whenever you eat Doritos… starscream comes to mind, causing you to laugh.  
150. The thought tha follows 'not so tough now are you screamer?' followed by more laughter.  
151. Airports in all of their boringness now scare you… after all a seeker has to roost **_**somewhere!  
152. **_**Whenever you see a yellow sports car (no matter the type) you want to see if it zaps you like sunstreaker.**_**  
153. **_**Pocky and Ramune are really liquid and solid forms of energon. (And tend to go insane when you manage to get your hands on some.)  
154. You have over two thousand pictures of both autobots and decepticons (with their alternate modes) somewhere, on your wall, USB, computer, Ipad, ECT.  
155. As you read all of these you nod and smile or laugh to yourself.  
156. You notice that you have done or do at least five of these things.  
157. You laugh when you realize that you want to now do all if not most of these things.  
158. The family member in the room next to you is giving you weird looks but you could care less.  
159. You're hopelessly obsessed and proud of it! You added to the list, or pasted some on your profile.  
160. TRANSFORMERS ADDICTS UNITE!  


* * *

  
**_

Sideswipe shuttered his optics as he came to the end of the binder. He was expecting at least another page of humor, but no this was the end. What did she mean by profile? After running a few scenarios he came to the conclusion that this had been printed out from the internet. He closed the binder and returned it to its hiding place before forwarding the remaining pages to the others. Thus he set off in search of Sera.

Sera's POV

I flopped on the couch after a hard day of training. N.E.S.T was cruel to the body. I was still disappointed that the binder hadn't turned up yet; I mean how hard was it to lose a freaking binder thicker than my thigh? Syria flopped down next to me and nursed her water bottle.

"You know its days like this when I could use a good laugh." She began

"Not right now sunny, im depressed." I moped

"When I find out who has it im going to rip their stomachs and feed it to them." Sunny growled

Bumblebee and Arcee walked/rolled in speaking about something, I caught the words hilarious, binder and twins.

*sunny maybe we should interrogate a few mechs in particular.*

*why not just threaten sam.*

*we have to find him.*

"Awesome." We bolted out of the and ran straight for Sam's office.

"Sam?" I called in to the office before knocking

"Yeah what now Syria?" Sam was kind of paranoid around us not that I blamed him.

"Sam we need a favor." Sunny began

"If it's to get you guys explosives, then the answer is no." he retorted his eye still slightly purple.

"As awesome as that would be no we need you for some leverage against bee. They were speaking about a binder and we think that it might be ours." I explained around Sam we didn't need to be soldiers around everyone else however.

"Depends what you mean by leverage." He narrowed his eyes at Syria.

"All we need you to do is stand there and look like you're afraid and in pain." Syria explained.

"Am I going to be in any real pain?"

"None at all prime, none at all." Syria purred using his cybertronian title.

"Fine." He agreed and we slipped out our swords and he followed us.

"I have a feeling that im going to be in pain." Sam muttered.

Sam and I waited outside of the until Syria called for us; apparently bumblebee and Arcee were sipping at cubes of energon still laughing.

'They aren't going to be laughing much longer.' I thought a little sadistically.

"Hey bee, Arcee can I ask you guys something." I began innocently walking up to them.

"Of course." Arcee responded cheerily.

"Have either of you seen a big black binder about as thick as my thigh?" I asked they stiffened before answering.

"Sorry Sera neither of us have seen it; if we do we'll tell you." Bumblebee responded somewhat shakily.

"Cut the bull shit and tell me who has it so I can dismember them as slowly as possible." I growled

"Are you accusing us of lying?" Arcee supposed almost sounding insulted.

I narrowed my eyes. "Does ironhide love his cannons?"

"We don't have it, nor do we know who has it." Bumblebee retorted.

"I know you're lying and if you don't tell me, well it would be most unfortunate for Samuel." Syria walked in with Sam in a headlock with her sword at his throat.

"Are you insane!" bee was about to get Sam but Syria pressed her sword in to Sam's throat and Sam squeaked.

"C'mon bee, just tell us where it is and Sam keeps his head." Syria growled smiling sadistically up at him.

Bumblebee and Arcee were jammed between a rock and a hard place. Though bumblebee seemed about to crack. *apply a little more pressure on him.* I ordered Syria and she squeezed his neck harder making him gag slightly.

"The twins have it." Bumblebee finally snapped.

"Which set?" I questioned

"Lamborghini." Arcee was also worried for Sam.

"Why am I not shocked. Thanks for playing along Sam, it was much appreciated." Syria thanked Sam.

As we walked away I faintly heard Sam speaking to bumblebee. "You were almost willing to let me die for a binder?"

I couldn't laugh about it now, I was too pissed. Though I can't say I was surprised at all, but to deliberately hide it from me and my sister and show it to every mech? No, that would not go unpunished. It explained why the mechs would randomly burst in to laughter or always have a smile on their face plates.

She wore her 'don't-bother-me-im- planning-something' face. *I know that face sides you have a plan.*

"Since they all seem to like that binder so much why don't we redecorate them to match it." Her lips curled in to a sadistic smirk.

"You are an evil genius." I agreed looking over what she wanted to do to every mech on base.

We skated to our quarters and of course the accursed Lamborghinis were waiting for us. I was promptly glomped by sideswipe. I hugged him back keeping the anger off my face; Syria was kissing sunstreaker quite passionately.

"Whats wrong?" sideswipe asked pulling me up the stairs along with him.

"Nothing sideswipe, im still kind of bummed that the binder hasn't shown up." I answered as truthfully as I could.

He tensed slightly but showed no other reaction to the mentioning of the binder. Though just by stiffening he proved his guilt, if there was any guilt.

"You'll find it Sera." He reassured pulling me on to the couch and flicking the television on.

"I hope so." I responded.

* * *

(Two days later; time: 8:00; Sera's POV)

After two days of preparation we had all we needed to pull our little revenge tactic, we had the paints, the glitter, the photos, even the getaway cars for later. Every human on base knew what was about to take place and had set up multiple cameras to capture the bots faces when they came out of recharge.

Syria typed furiously in to her laptop initiating the base wide lockout. Basically the mechs would end up sleeping in their alternate modes tonight in the main hanger making our job much easier but first we needed them to come out of their quarters.

A small alarm signaling decepticon activity sounded around base and the humans looked back at us for reassurance. I gave them thumbs up and right on que the mechs thundered in and Syria locked all of the mech sized room, even the med bay and changed the access code while turning off the alarm all in a few minutes while the chaos was happening.

"What happened?" A few mechs questioned.

"The alarm was tripped but there was no signal anywhere on the planet's surface." Prowl noted.

"Perhaps there is a glitch in the system."

Syria nonchalantly slipped her laptop back in to her bag and stood up next to me. I held back a laugh as they walked away from the monitors to their quarters only to find themselves locked out and unable to access the rooms in any way.

"Fraggit!" was the most common word used by each of the mechs.

Well all except for optimus and prowl since they were trying to maintain some dignity in this situation. I held back laughter as the humans dispersed and the bots tried to figure out where they were going to recharge now, since their rooms were blocked off to them.

After an hour of bickering though optimus ordered that they would try again in the morning and that they would all recharge in the main hanger with their alternate modes. Big mistake prime!

* * *

..Midnight..

All the bots were now in a deep recharge including our initial targets the twins. If you are wondering why we are doing this to all of them… well they all read it so quit questioning me!

Syria hacked in to their processors from a wireless uplink on her laptop and induced them in to a medical comma that would last until she decided to get rid of it or until we were far away enough to have a chance at escaping.

She gave me the go ahead sign and our friends came in with multiple paint cans and photocopied pictures from the binder. We began with optimus since he was the largest therefore the most time consuming. After about fifteen minutes though the once red and blue semi was now pitch black with various stickers on him all from the binder itself.

We then broke up in to two teams, autobots and decepticons and split the remaining bots in half. We got sunstreaker and sideswipe of course and we went to town on their paint jobs. In the end though all of the bots well accept Ironhide who was already black had a new paintjob. Along with some new decals Syria was now hacking sunny and sides room so I could retrieve the binder and hide it again hopefully where no one would ever see it again!

"Thanks for the help guys." I said as they all got in to their cars.

"No prob, guys just call us if they ever get a hold of it again." Meagan said with an evil smile closing the door of her Cadillac CTS.

We waved at them until they drove off in to the night leaving us to make preparations for our escape. I gathered the binder from sideswipes messy side of the room. Walking out with the binder in hand I saw Syria prepping our getaway cars, the red Ferrari 458 Italia for some autobot, and sideswipes old alternate mode the Chevy Corvette Stingray or Centennial which ever you preferred to call it. Either way both cars were orgasm worthy.

"How far do you think we are going to have to go?" I asked handing her the binder.

"I would say a state or two, maybe just flee the country for a good six months." She mused

"I think Los Angeles is far enough." I added.

"Let's think about that later right now we need to get out of here, I already unlocked their stasis so they should be waking up soon.

As if to answer her the sound of grinding gears could be heard in the hanger. We jumped in both sports cars and drove off gunning the engines as we did. Though we didn't miss sunstreaker scream

"MY PAINT!"

*think it was worth it?* I questioned over the bond as we hit the highway at top speed.

*oh yes, yes it was.*

* * *

Sideswipe's POV

In retrospect he should have seen this coming but of course it still kind of pissed him off that she had actually gone through with it. He knew someone had ratted him out and was determined to find out whom! The paint no matter how hard he tried would not come off. He needed to ask her where she got it and what other colors they had because this was really high quality.

Then there were the images… what could he say each one of them looked like the binder cover had thrown up on them and then proceeded to do it various times. The image of sera on his wrist joint was mocking him he just knew it. Somewhere off in the distance he could almost hear her laughing her aft off at them. Pit she probably had taken pictures of her handy work and was keeping them as blackmail.

The main hanger doors were closed due to the less than dignifying appearance of their leader. Actually when they had all come out of recharge various soldiers were taking pictures of each of them especially sunstreaker.

Sunny had gotten it bad, he even had the cute little pink bow on his roof which translated to some armor on his helm. As you can bet he did not take it well and to add more fuel to the fire Sera and Syria had left their signatures on him as well as a few entries from the actual binder on his arm plating.

Nobody was taking pictures of each other after all they all looked ridiculous and this probably wouldn't go away for a while but looking at himself and his brother he noted that out of all the mechs they had it the worse.

A sweet little note had been found in the center of all the chaos written by none other than the culprits.

'_This is what happens when you steal; we'll be in Alaska by the time you read this so good luck! Oh and this was just a baby prank to what we could have done. If I had it my way I would have tied you all up and hung you from the golden gate bridge and start to take potshots at all of you with a rocket launcher but alas this was Sera's ideal prank. _

_After all if you liked the binder so much, why don't you take on its appearance?  
P.S I want that bow back!  
P.S.S this is what happens when you mess with the Queens of Pranks. '_

He had an inkling that she was lying about the location, but he could believe that she would risk exposing them if it meant taking a few pot shots at them.

Shaking his helm he tried to tune out his brothers profanities and attempted to contact sera for the umpteenth time this morning. The dial tone rang in his head three times followed by sera's chipper voice telling him to leave a message after the beep. Of all the things he wanted to say all he could manage was a 'call me back as soon as possible.' Before hanging up and trying to pry off a few of the pictures she had pasted on him with little success.

"Stupid glue." He grumbled before giving up and looking towards his brother.

Sunstreaker in vein tried to rip the bow off of his helm with little notable success. Optimus had managed to pry off most of the pictures and decorations except for one stubborn one that remained pasted to his fore helm. Prowls door wings were covered in pictures as was his chevron and most of his legs but he was making progress at getting it all off. Ironhide being the lucky mech that he was simply had to peel off the pictures which he was doing as of now. Ratchet was mad that was all he was going to say and was taking it out on him and his brother once he managed to get himself back to his normal colors. Jolt was much the same, he had never seen the mech so peeved at him specifically since he was sp quiet but the first thing he said when he caught a glance of himself was

'I blame the twins for this.'

Arcee was silent not voicing her complaints which didn't surprise him at all seeing as she and bee had simply black paint and one picture with some bedazzles on them and that's it. They looked guilty making him pretty sure they were the ones who ratted him and his brother out. He could hear the humans outside laughing and resisted the urge to tell them to frag off and go find something better to do.

It would only give them the pleasure of knowing that it did bother him that a female outdid him in a prank and pit did it bother him. Especially since sera had made it clear that pranks no longer interested her and she needed something more… stimulating. He also remembered what that specific conversation led to.

A resounding beep sounded from the monitors signaling that contact had been made. Both of their faces popped up on the larger monitors.

Sera wore a large grin on her face, while Syria was having a full out laugh attack.

"Hey douche bags whats up?" Syria greeted a wide smirk on her face.

"I believe you know whats up." Optimus gestured to every mech in the room.

"Yeah, you know you look better than I thought it would turn out." Sera had a pensive look on her face.

"I told you the bow was necessary." Syria commented snickering as sunstreaker snarled at her.

Of the few times he had ever been more than mildly annoyed with her this was the first time he had actually seen him snarl at her after they had agreed to date.

"Hey don't be so angry about it, after all it's your own fault." Her eyes narrowed at seemingly everyone in the room.

"I can understand the twins but why everyone else?" jolt commented.

Syria shrugged "You all read it, so we figured that you should all get punishment."

"After the first thing we said to you all was to not come in to our rooms without permission and you broke that rule which also credited for the punishment." Sera explained.

"So now you care about rules?" prowl asked well more like growled.

"Only our own prowler, only our own." Syria laughed.

"You are to report back to base immediately." Optimus ordered.

"Prime, we are crazy but we are not suicidal besides we have reservations in Alaska for some fun."

"We'll see you in a week!" they both cackled evilly and the screen went black.

Well they were fragged if they wanted all of this off them before they got to them. Besides even when they managed to pry all the stuff they had pasted on to them off they would be (if they really meant it) in Alaska.

A text message popped up on his HUD from none other sera, curious he opened it and read the three short words.

**XJetJudoApprenticeX: Revenge is Sweet, babe.**

* * *

**Authors note: eventually the girls were dragged back unwillingly by their botfriends and thoroughly given the cold shoulder. Not that they cared after all IT WAS SO WORTH IT to quote Sera.**

**Im sorry this took so long! Don't hate me! I know the ending sucks but I have been focusing on the rewrite of TaU and haven't had much time for this. Along with the slight writers block on how I wanted the bots to get punished.**

**Anyway the ending was half assed and I was planning to go a little further but eleven pages is a lot to me and my finger have started to hurt.**

**Oh yeah numbers 149- 154 were inspired by _Wrena Wolfkin_ I just tweaked them a bit to fit.**

**anyway, review and tell me what you thought… im sorry it's so late!**


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